The White Enchantress (Songs of Another Time Book 1) by Caitriona Drexler

Author:Caitriona Drexler [Drexler, Caitriona]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: anonymous
Published: 2023-04-21T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter 18

Lancelot

The day after Guinevere pledged her loyalty to Arthur, the king summons me to his chambers. “Answer me plainly, Lancelot. Are you in love with Lady Guinevere?” I have been waiting for this question to be asked ever since the events of the previous evening. Try as I might, I cannot hide my feelings for Guinevere.

“What does it matter? I will not act upon it.”

“Yes, then.”

“I will never lie to you, Arthur. Yes. I do believe I love Guinevere. I have never felt such stirrings within me. Regardless, you must believe me when I tell you that I have not touched her nor made my feelings known to her. She does not care for me in that way.”

“What makes you say this?”

“Her heart belongs to another. Even though he is gone from this earth, it is clear that she still thinks of him often. He still holds her heart.”

“That might be true, but I believe she has more of her heart to give. Lancelot, I am considering making a proposal of marriage to Guinevere. I will not do this if it is your heart she seeks. Nor can I, in good faith, take her from a man I consider a friend.”

“She is not mine. You would not be taking her from me,” I say out loud. But inside, I want to tear Arthur’s throat out for even thinking of proposing to the woman I love.

“Hmm. Still, I will not ask for Guinevere’s hand. Though that might not be the case for the majority of the unmarried men lodging here as my guests. If you care for Guinevere, if you think what you feel is love, you should be honest with her. I give you my blessing to court her if you wish.”

“I…thank you, my king. But what would the people think of me courting the lady? They all assume she will become your queen. Her allegiance to you would be permanent. And I do not need a wife.”

“Everyone needs someone to love, Lancelot.”

I leave Arthur’s chamber feeling elated yet terrified. What am I to say to Guinevere? I cannot tell her that Arthur has given his permission for me to wed her, bed her, and call her mine. She is not like other women, like the women at court whose only objective in life is to find a husband.

Guinevere might have been betrothed before, but she ran from her marriage, following her own path. I am desperate to be part of that path, to be part of her life. But does she want me in hers?

At times I think so. The way she looks at me, searching, needing something from me. Other times her gaze feels distant, as if she is not looking at me but through me, to another place. One where her Josh is still alive. I envy this man. Not even knowing who he was. For he had won the heart of a woman unlike anyone I have known. A strange, beautiful woman.

I love her. What

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